A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen.
He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without even looking and fired a shot into the ceiling.
“Which one of you sidewinders stole my horse?!”, he yelled with surprising forcefulness.
No one answered.
“Alright, I’m gonna have another beer, and if my horse ain’t back outside by the time I finish, I’m gonna do what I dun in Texas! And I don’t like to have to do what I dun in Texas!”
Some of the locals shifted restlessly. The man, true to his word, had another beer, walked outside, and his horse has been returned to the post.
He saddled up and started to ride out of town. The bartender wandered out of the bar and asked, “Say partner, before you go… what happened in Texas?”
The cowboy turned back and said, “I had to walk home.”
Them: boi if you don’t
Me, an intellectual: male, if you do not refrain
”I call it the Buoyancy Operated Aquatic Transporter, or Bo-At for short.”
”I’m not crying, I’m just sweating through my eyes”
when they all shrunk themselves and Baljeet got stuck on top of the lamp with the dead flies
“My name is Doof, and you’ll do what I say, whoop whoop!”
Candace’s voice when she had an allergic reaction to wild parsnips
“Ah, Perry The Platypus, your timing is incredible. And by incredible, I mean comPLETELY CREDIBLE!!!”
Buford’s cupid costume
”I never leave home without my velvet rope!” “Where do you keep that?” “I’ll never tell.”
”So, do I know romance or what?” “What.” “I said, do I know romanc–” “I heard you”
Phineas’s dAMN OBLIVIOUSNESS. LIKE, ISABELLA MAKES IT SO CLEAR THAT SHE LIKES HIM BUT THE BOY CAN’T TAKE A HINT
Marty the rabbit boy and his musical blender
”We small band of brothers…and girl from across the street”
”What did you think? A (insert name of object) was just going to fall out of the sky?” *said object falls out of the sky*
STAR WARS CROSSOVER
MARVEL CROSSOVER
when Doofenshmirtz gets glue all over his hands and they get stuck to records, and Perry uses the body control helmet to make Doof create what’s arguably the greatest song ever
Running from love in a bear suit
that one time Alex Hirsch guest starred as a talking juice box
“Paulllll Bunyan’s! Where the food is good (but not too good, eh?)”
“Mom! Phineas and Ferb made me!” “I have some stretch marks that would suggest otherwise.”
Baljeet and Buford’s bromance
the episode when they got the band back together. Just…that episode in its entirety.
“Hit it Carl!” “WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!” *Carl pulls lever anyway*
when Isabella out-cuted the Meaps with her own natural cuteness
“It’s a scientific fact!”
“I’m you from the future!” “Wait, I am not Indian in the future?”
“I feel reasonably sure it’s over this time. No, wait, he’s up AGAIIIIN”
when Perry bit Doofenshmirtz’s finger and Phineas says “Perry, no! We do not bite the elderly!”
Ferb’s adorable crush on Vanessa
when Baljeet accidentally takes a rock and roll summer class and gets mad because it’s not graded, and performs one hell of a song
Planty the Potted Plant
“GET ON THE TRIKE!!!”
Carl’s “Dr. Coconut” dance
Tuff Shoo Laysizz
“TREES ARE MADE OF WOOD”
O.W.C.A. Secret Headquarters (pay no attention to this sign)
“My watermelon!”
the giant floating baby head
Lots of me
when Doof got zapped with the ugly-inator and nothing changed
when Monogram kept laughing about Doofenshmirtz being abbreviated as Doof
I have seen all of five episodes from this show. Maybe.
This is a odd show.
Why do my nostrils whisper to meeeee
“thwart me, perry the platypus”
This show was the ultimate shitpost but damn it was the best
“GET ON THE TRIKE” is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen omg
AngelMihe 